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Saturday, February 12, 2011

Thanks for Coming!

Coming.

Well that you know what kind of person I am, I'd like to extend a warm welcome to the pants party, that is http://www.brassandfrags.blogspot.com/
I'm not exactly sure what you'll expect to find in this blog yet, but I assure you, it'll be as eclectic and edifying as a stroll around the public library, sans the homeless people. I suppose the first thing I should do is introduce myself. I call myself Bring_Napkins. Coming up with that handle wasn't one of my most awe-inspiring moments but rest assured, its the name I was born to inherit. Because I tend to steal napkins. Hatin' already? Well damn. Anyway to make sure you find this website an experience you'll never forget (until you leave the site), I'll start off with some perfectly useless trivia so you can fool your friends into thinking you're a walking encyclopedia of arbitrary facts, as is the dream of many.

Perfectly Useless Information
Part 1 of What I'm Sure Will Be Many
  • Sharon Stone has a black belt in Karate
  • Monaco's national orchestra is bigger than its army.
  • The screwdriver was invented before the screw.
  • Sean Connery is an anagram for 'Screen Annoy'
  • 85% of all life on Earth is plankton.
  • A polecat is not a cat. It is a nocturnal European weasel.
  • Women invent things. Namely; the fire escape, the laser printer, condensed milk, cotton gin and the all important rotary engine.
  • Almost is the longest word in the english language with all the letters in alphabetical order.
  • Mick Jagger chose Lord Patrick Lichfield as his best man. [Told you this site would be good]
  • Hungry? Don't read the Bible then, as it mentions 49 different kinds of food.
  • If you slowly pour a handful of salt into a totally full glass of water, it will not overflow, but instead will be drained of its essence.
Wasn't that a great way to start the blog, eh? Y- It was okay? I'm taking it relatively easy on this post because I'd prefer to show my true colours when you're hooked deeper into reading my fascinating input on our earthly cultures. Until then, please enjoy this humourous image which I'm sure you will find utterly humorous and not at all stupid.

FUCK.

- I use this space here to write witty, insightful lines just like this one.

30 comments:

  1. Bird making pasta! MIND BLOWN!

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  2. Useful facts. Best of luck with your blogging. Followed.

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  3. My brother is also notorious for stealing napkins. Are you my brother?

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  4. Almost is the longest word in the english language with all the letters in alphabetical order.

    really? wow i never knew

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  5. "The screwdriver was invented before the screw"

    its like the chicken came before the egg

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  6. haha love extreme advertising

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  7. man, who ever though women invent things? nah jk, keep it up! i was well entertained :P

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  8. Eli Whitney was rocking a pair of ovaries?! But I can totally buy women making condensed milk...

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  9. that was some useless information.

    of that much I am certain.

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  10. "Vegatron said...
    Eli Whitney was rocking a pair of ovaries?!"

    Huh...I wonder how I made that mistake. My bad.

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  11. I love the time-wasting blogs. It's a great place to just browse and calm down.

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  12. Useless information is great for telling people in conversation and making it look like you know...things.

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  13. the plankton thing made me feel all weird inside.

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  14. Hahah brilliant,I love these sorts of things.

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  15. haha interesting post

    followed

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  16. Loving the fact! Genuinely keep up the good posts

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  17. Any dose of LSD will kill an elephant stone dead. Interesting facts++. ;)

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  18. hehe, sweet. Imagine somebody that gets hyper active from skittles, for them... ...its perfect!

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  19. holy shit i got smashed off that stuff at a party last night XD im still fighting the hangover now but that shit was so good

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  20. I thought a polecat was a skunk. Damn, we southerners are retarded, just making shit up.

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  21. Awesome! I enjoy your humor greatly

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  22. i love the last picture of a real bird trying to make pasta. maybe i do have a strange sense of humor i cracked up.

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